Hilarious Help Wanted Ads

In this piece, News Target satires new employmentreluctantly contribute to approval of dubious drugs,
postings at the Food and Drug Administration (FDA).or, in some cases, drugs are approved against the
Some highlights:Propaganda Officer: Help the FDAinvestigators' recommendations.Part of the problem is
create and spread information that discreditsthat these professionals are so disheartened when
products, companies and ideas that threaten FDAthey realize that more than 50 percentof the money
control. No scientific background necessary.Sciencethe FDA spends reviewing drugs comes from the
Censor: Bury scientific findings that harm the prestigepharmaceutical industry. A full 80 percentof the FDA's
and credibility of the FDA.Chief Oppression Officer:resources are geared toward the approval of new
Conduct armed raids on places where dangerousdrugs, and only 20 percentfor all the rest. Only 5
criminals are teaching patients about nutrition.Kickbackpercent goes to drug safety.Then their hands are
Coordinator: Keep tabs on FDA managers'tied as they watch these same drugs harm
investments in pharmaceutical companies. Criminalthousands of people. It is not uncommon for
background preferred, mob ties are a plus.Moralerespected FDA veterans to leave the FDA having
Officer: Keep FDA employees in line to boost moralelost confidence in the safety or effectiveness of
and work efficiency.Public Safety Program Director:prescription drugs. Morale at the FDA is at an all-time
Not really a full-time job. In fact, you don't even needlow.Already, the FDA has become little more than a
to show up.News Target August 13, 2005Dr.rubber-stamp approval process for Big Pharma. While
Mercola's Comment:These humorous ads carry thecurrent "industry-friendly" policy stands, things will only
distinct bite of truth. Slowly but surely, pressure fromget worse as more and more honest employees are
management and frustration among workingdriven out.Dr. Mercola is the founder of Mercola.com,
scientists is driving out the employees at the FDAone of the world's most visited and trusted health
who really care about drug safety, and replacingwebsites, and publisher of the free e-newsletter --
them with tools of the pharmaceutical industry.Thethe #1 dietary health and wellness newsletter on the
current climate at the FDA is causing anWeb with over 500,000 subscribers. Dr. Mercola, a
unprecedented amount of employee turnover. Inphysician for over two decades, is also a New York
2002, the Wall Street Journal reported that 15Times bestselling author whose latest book, "Dr.
percent of FDA medical officer jobs were vacant.Mercola's Total Health Program," presents his entire
This is much higher than at other similar governmentrenowned dietary health program and has sold over
agencies, such as the National Institute of Health150,000 copies. He is routinely interviewed by the
(NIH)or the Centers for Disease Control andmedia for his expert insights, including CNN and ABC
Prevention (CDC).Top scientists who have committedWorld News Tonight. His passion is to change the
their lives to public safety are being prevented fromfatally flawed conventional medical system to one
doing their jobs, and are either giving up and quittingfocused on real prevention and cure.
or being forced out. Honest scientists are forced to